As you can tell by the picture above, Debbie was very happy this weekend. Sure, she loves what she does for a living. Sure, she kinda likes me. However, her greatest love is being Mom to her boy, Hogan.
And her boy surprised her by coming home this weekend to start his spring break from Coastal Carolina. I was reminded this morning of a picture from Easter Weekend a year ago.
This was the way his high school (Parkwood) let the Seniors of 2020 know that their year was over. We were in the early throws of the pandemic, and this was a very depressing time for him (and us). All he had worked toward and looked forward to (his final golf season, prom, graduation) was lost. Just remembering and writing about it now, makes me hurt. However, this year was MUCH better and happier.
Although it does look strange (like we were robbing a bank with Matt Stell), I can promise you were all smiling with Matt as live music returned to our lives with the show at Blackfinn in Ballantyne. The next morning, this group did what we’ve been doing together for 10 years.
I can’t even tell you the joy the two dads on the end had playing golf with the clowns in the middle. We’ve practically raised these two as brothers and the time spent together was priceless.
And then, this morning came. Hogan got up and headed back to the beach for some much-needed and deserved r&r. I’m getting better about this, I really am. I no longer break out into an ugly cry when he leaves (although I writing this through tears right now), but it still hurts to see him go.
I know this is part of life and parenting and all that, but damn I wish he was four again and I could just start over and keep repeating it forever until I feel I get it 100% right. There are some things that I fear I will never fully get used to and will always sting my heart a little. This view below is of him driving away from home, is at the top of the list.