North Carolina Professional Golfer Loses Fight With Mental Illness
I purposefully used the term “loses fight with mental illness” in the title of this blog so that I could express my anger with it. Over the weekend North Carolina native and professional golfer Grayson Murray killed himself. Yes, he committed suicide. A lot of people don’t like using those words. And I think that’s part of the problem.
Avoiding The Stigma Of Suicide Is Not Helping
There’s some sort of stigma that we are apparently trying to avoid. Folks we’ve got a real problem. And trying to avoid stigma by making things not sound as harsh, doesn’t appear to be helping. Did I know Grayson Murray? Personally, no. Professionally, only had one encounter over the years. Did I know and love 4 people in the last 12 months who killed themselves? Yes. And I’m angry. I’m angry at the action each person took. I’m even angrier that I wasn’t somehow able to say or do something to let each one know how loved and missed he/she would be. I’ve become friendly over the years with Kip Henley. He’s a professional caddy who worked for a while on Grayson’s bag. Following him on X/Twitter this weekend has been heartbreaking.
The Pain Of Suicide For Those Left Behind
This has got to be an unbelievable pain on the hearts of Grayson Murray’s family. Unlike some (like my late brother-in-law), Grayson’s struggles with mental health were not just well documented (alcoholism, depression, etc.) but openly acknowledged by Grayson himself. To everyone around him, it seemed Grayson Murray had “turned a corner.” Professionally, he’d recently returned to the winner’s circle, winning the PGA Tour’s Sony Open in Hawaii. On the personal front, he was engaged to be married. In fact, speaking of that win in Hawaii. At the post round press conference Grayson even discussed his challenges with mental illness.
I don’t pretend to have the answers. I wish I did. I’m still struggling with the loss of those in my life to suicide in the last year. I think I always will. That doesn’t mean I or any of us should stop looking for those answers and ways to help others who are suffering. There’s got to be a way to let them know the hole they would be leaving behind in our lives. There’s got to be a way to let them know suicide is not the answer. And maybe a start is to quit avoiding the stigma of that word. Don’t invent phrases to smooth over a problem and make it sound more palatable. It is not.
What Can YOU Do?
Today is May 27. There are still four days left in Mental Health Awareness Month. Earlier this month, I was lucky enough to win $40,000 for suicide prevention in North Carolina. I and my co-workers will be involved with their events moving forward. I invite you to join us as well. WRAL reminds us, If you’re having suicidal thoughts or a mental health crisis, call or text 988 or call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 800-273-8255. Veterans can press “1” after dialing 988 to connect directly to the Veterans Crisis Lifeline. For texts, veterans should continue to text the Veterans Crisis Lifeline short code: 838255.
